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The Myth of Self-esteem
How Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy Can Change Your Life Forever

Rating
271 Ratings by Goodreads |
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Format
Paperback, 344 pages
Published
United States, 3 October 2005

What exactly is self-esteem? Most people, as well as many psychologists and educators, believe we need it, that it's good for our emotional well-being, and that it makes us more successful. World-renowned psychologist Albert Ellis says no, it's all a myth. According to Ellis, self-esteem is probably the greatest emotional disturbance known to humans. Self-esteem results in each of us praising ourselves when what we do is approved by others. But we also damn ourselves when we don't do well enough and others disapprove of us. What we need more than self-esteem, Ellis maintains, is self-acceptance! In "The Myth of Self-Esteem", Ellis provides a lively and insightful explanation of self-esteem and self-acceptance, examining the thinking of great religious teachers, philosophers, and psychologists, including Lao Tsu, Jesus, Spinoza, Nietzsche, Kierkegaard, Buber, Heidegger, Sartre, Tillich, DT Suzuki, the Dalai Lama, Carl Rogers, and Nathaniel Branden, among others. He then provides exercises for training oneself to change self-defeating habits to the healthy, positive approach of self-acceptance. These include specific thinking techniques as well as emotive and behavioural exercises.
He concludes by stressing that unconditional self-acceptance is the basis for establishing healthy relationships with others, along with unconditional other-acceptance and a total philosophy of life anchored in unconditional life-acceptance.


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Product Description

What exactly is self-esteem? Most people, as well as many psychologists and educators, believe we need it, that it's good for our emotional well-being, and that it makes us more successful. World-renowned psychologist Albert Ellis says no, it's all a myth. According to Ellis, self-esteem is probably the greatest emotional disturbance known to humans. Self-esteem results in each of us praising ourselves when what we do is approved by others. But we also damn ourselves when we don't do well enough and others disapprove of us. What we need more than self-esteem, Ellis maintains, is self-acceptance! In "The Myth of Self-Esteem", Ellis provides a lively and insightful explanation of self-esteem and self-acceptance, examining the thinking of great religious teachers, philosophers, and psychologists, including Lao Tsu, Jesus, Spinoza, Nietzsche, Kierkegaard, Buber, Heidegger, Sartre, Tillich, DT Suzuki, the Dalai Lama, Carl Rogers, and Nathaniel Branden, among others. He then provides exercises for training oneself to change self-defeating habits to the healthy, positive approach of self-acceptance. These include specific thinking techniques as well as emotive and behavioural exercises.
He concludes by stressing that unconditional self-acceptance is the basis for establishing healthy relationships with others, along with unconditional other-acceptance and a total philosophy of life anchored in unconditional life-acceptance.

Product Details
EAN
9781591023548
ISBN
1591023548
Dimensions
22.9 x 15.5 x 1.8 centimeters (0.36 kg)

About the Author

Albert Ellis, PhD (1913-2007) practiced psychotherapy, marriage and family counseling, and sex therapy for over sixty years. He was the author of more than eighty books, including many popular best sellers. Other books by Albert Ellis available from Prometheus Books are: The Myth of Self-Esteem; The Road to Tolerance; Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy: It Works for Me--It Can Work for You; Overcoming Destructive Beliefs, Feelings, and Behaviors: New Directions for Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy; and (with Raymond J. Yeager) Why Some Therapies Don't Work: The Dangers of Transpersonal Psychology.

Reviews

""[A] stimulating examination of how the teachings of the world’s greatest thinkers and philosophers dovetail (or don’t) with Ellis’s three core concepts: unconditional acceptance of the self, others and the world....The book, which includes multiple self-acceptance exercises, may be among his best: Every page offers a fresh insight into rational emotive behavior therapy, Ellis’s doctrine of modern stoicism.”
—Psychology Today

“Albert Ellis is a contemporary prophet whose ideas will be remembered along with those of Jesus, Buddha, Lao Tzu and Sartre. In this important book, he shows how to develop self-acceptance as well as to learn how to create healthy relationships. In a world of increasing involvement with machines (i.e., computers, televisions, video games) and decreasing involvement with people, nothing could be more needed.”
—Jon Carlson, PsyD, EdD, ABPP
Distinguished Professor, Governors State University

“This wonderful book, as it helps us move toward greater compassion for ourselves, for others, and for our troubled world, is one more significant contribution by Dr. Ellis—not only toward greater personal happiness, but also toward a better world.”
—Howard C. Cutler, M.D.
coauthor (with the Dalai Lama) of The Art of Happiness, A Handbook for Living

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Customer Reviews
4.04 out of 5 | From 271 Goodreads Ratings

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By Alex on June 4, 2008
I've read 4 books by Albert Ellis, "A Guide to Rational Living", "The Road to Tolerance", "How To Live With A Neurotic", and this book. I would have to say, that not only did I enjoy this book the most, but I think that his unique psychology/philosophy is one that would make a very positive impact on the world if more people understand it. This book is slightly different to other self-help books that I've read. The great majority of the book is a discussion on the philosophy of human worth, and more specifically the different philosophies that are common in our western world. The different discussions on the philosophy of human worth are: - The philosophy of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), especially its key underpinning of unconditional self-acceptance, unconditional other-acceptance, and unconditional life-acceptance. - Self-esteem and especially conditional self-esteem. - The advantages and disadvantages of the two different philosophies of human worth, both REBT and self-esteem. - The concept of the philosophy of human worth itself. - He compares the philosophy of REBT with the philosophies of many past famous philosophers. Finally, near the end of the book he discusses practical methods used to adopt the teachings of REBT and how they can improve your emotional health. In my opinion, this is one of the best books I have ever read. It describes a very good argument on a practical philosophy of human worth, and particularly in the emotional consequences of that philosophy in your life. This book had a very profound effect on me, more than almost any other self-help books that I have read. It would take a long time to describe just how it has benefited me, but it has benefited every area of my life. Work, intimate relationships, risk taking, recreational pursuits, interpersonal relationships, you name it. I must note, that I was already very familiar with cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and the role of thinking in emotions and behaviors before reading this book. If you are a relative beginner in CBT or self-help material, you may benefit more from David Burns' book "Feeling Good". In my opinion this book may offer a more beginner friendly introduction to the topic. Once you have practiced the practical skills you will be very much ready for a book like Ellis' here. If you have an interest in philosophy of human worth, or if you are interesting in enhancing your life through self-help books, this book may just be one of the best books that you may read. If you have the honesty to self-assess and self-analyse your thinking and problems in life, this book will work even better. If you don't, you may just learn what it takes to have the courage to self-analyse the problems that you have, and to minimise or move on from them (a hint is something about unconditional self-acceptance). (Note: When you read the topic of unconditional self-acceptance, try not to brush it off as accepting yourself as you are and not doing a thing to improve yourself. It holds more wisdom than that.)
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